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Yesterday while working on a printer I looked over at dad and saw him face down, asleep on a newspaper, a line of drool hanging from his lip, snoring loudly, and a line from Fight Club came to me: "Our fathers are our models for God." This started a pretty depressing line of thought that I'm not going to repeat here, but it also gave me the desire to watch Fight Club again. Then, after arriving home, I started discussing Palahniuk with Dame, and this reminded me I wanted to watch it. So I decided to haul my bigass exercize bike up to the computer and TV and ride the bike while doing those things. I'm not comfortable unless I do two or three things at once. The plan was to ride the bike for the entire movie. I didn't get far into the movie before I saw the irony of riding a goddamn exercize bike while watching this particular movie, and I felt kind of silly for it. Eventually I heard the line that summed up the feeling that gave me the silly feeling and wrote it down so I wouldn't forget it: "Self-improvement is masturbation." In another bit of irony, I was scratching my nuts as Brad Pitt said that line. I lie not. The silly feeling didn't stop me from riding the bike though. While I think some of the ideas in the movie are pretty neat, I'm not about to go blowing up any buildings. And even if I did, I'd think I'd have to be in pretty good shape to do it. After all, it looked to me like they only wanted the cream of the crop to be Space Monkeys. Except Bitchtits Bob. And look what happened to him. He got shot in the head and became lowly Robert Paulson. Shoulda got his bitchtits drained... maybe then he could have ran faster. Same as I should develop and strengthen this gimp leg, so if I ever get recruited by a cult of insane anarchistic soapmakers I can follow through with their plans without getting my brains blown out prematurely.
In any case, I didn't ride for the entire movie. I did ride for 25 miles though, and burned.... shit, I wanna say 480 or 240 calories. i think 480. 240 seems like a small number. Definitely 25 miles, though. Upon reaching that point I said enough's enough and quit.
Sometime through the ordeal, Courtney called and invited me to her house to play games with her, her husband, and their friends. I declined, saying I was sweaty and tired. She quipped that she was going to stop asking me to come along. I almost replied "Please do," but I held my tongue. I still don't want to be rude to her. I'm afraid that's gonna be what it's gonna take.
I just learned that Hank Williams got rid of his wife by shooting a gun through a door. That seemed to work for Christian Slater in Heathers, too. Soon as he started shooting up stereos and shit, Winona Ryder stopped liking him. 'Course, he turned out to be a fucking nut, but they can't all be as cool as they initially seem. Point is, a high caliber firearm seems to scare people away pretty quick. Wonder why.
But yeah. Kinda strange. I just spent two hours watching country music with my parents, and enjoyed it. Mainly cause it was about Hank Sr. I have no problems with Hank Sr. The second one's kinda weird. The third one hasn't offended me yet. But two hours of the original's not a bad way to spend the night.
Now I figure I'll continue what I started this morning... I've been erasing all the crap I don't use on this piece of shit computer. I killed so many worthless programs this morning... the computer's already running better. Figure I'll go through all the shitty movies and whatnot tonight... and kill all the mp3s I don't listen to tomorrow. That'll be a job.
Nugent fucking rocks.
In any case, I didn't ride for the entire movie. I did ride for 25 miles though, and burned.... shit, I wanna say 480 or 240 calories. i think 480. 240 seems like a small number. Definitely 25 miles, though. Upon reaching that point I said enough's enough and quit.
Sometime through the ordeal, Courtney called and invited me to her house to play games with her, her husband, and their friends. I declined, saying I was sweaty and tired. She quipped that she was going to stop asking me to come along. I almost replied "Please do," but I held my tongue. I still don't want to be rude to her. I'm afraid that's gonna be what it's gonna take.
I just learned that Hank Williams got rid of his wife by shooting a gun through a door. That seemed to work for Christian Slater in Heathers, too. Soon as he started shooting up stereos and shit, Winona Ryder stopped liking him. 'Course, he turned out to be a fucking nut, but they can't all be as cool as they initially seem. Point is, a high caliber firearm seems to scare people away pretty quick. Wonder why.
But yeah. Kinda strange. I just spent two hours watching country music with my parents, and enjoyed it. Mainly cause it was about Hank Sr. I have no problems with Hank Sr. The second one's kinda weird. The third one hasn't offended me yet. But two hours of the original's not a bad way to spend the night.
Now I figure I'll continue what I started this morning... I've been erasing all the crap I don't use on this piece of shit computer. I killed so many worthless programs this morning... the computer's already running better. Figure I'll go through all the shitty movies and whatnot tonight... and kill all the mp3s I don't listen to tomorrow. That'll be a job.
Nugent fucking rocks.
